My Crazy January

Spoiler alert: it hasn’t been that crazy but you wouldn’t actually read on if I’d have said my mental break down month right?

So I’ve had a strange January if anything, it’s been full of spunking money on things that I definitely don’t need, deferring my French uni module and getting back into running. Most of my friends knew that towards the end of last year I was running on overdrive, I had no time for anything, my hours were all planned from 6am- 10pm and I plain wasn’t enjoying life. Whenever I would drink I would get so drunk and either cry or to the point where I wouldn’t remember what had happened during the night – yeh, not so cool.

The reason for this was I had taken too much on; two uni modules, a now 3 hour commute to and from work everyday, 9 hours at work, the stress of wedding and hen do planning, getting back into running/trying to get in shape and all while still trying to have a social life. It just didn’t give me any free time to a) myself and b) with Ben. I think the saying is burning the candle at both ends? But I’m notorious for getting these sayings wrong!

So I decided I couldn’t do and have everything and something would have to give. After a chat down the pub when Ben’s rents came down to see us, I was basically told that I would never get anywhere near professional levels in my running career (which I knew anyway!) and therefore it should be uni I should focus on. After growing up with parents who were so chilled with what we did after we had done our qualifications, funnily enough I didn’t like being told that. So I followed my heart and chose to stick at running, my favourite outlet for stress, a sport in which, no I won’t excel at starting at the age of 21, but I love! On the rare occasion I did open my French books, I was always grumpy, stressed because my ‘tutor’ was the least helpful one I’d had so far and we got off on the wrong foot straight away and upset that I wasn’t excelling as fast as I have with German. So I deferred the year.

Many people would see that as admitting defeat but I’m someone who will often not see things through and it won’t bother me at all. I can return to it, of course, but for the time being there is no point attempting to put half of my heart into something when I could give it my all when I am at a better place in life. Over Christmas I decided to get a lot of wedding planning done so I’m no longer stressed about that and I’m actively making sure I go to as many social events as I can make so not to become a boring loner who lives in the countryside and see’s no-one but her fiancé!

So my weeks are now organised by long runs, my track training (I have finely returned to athletics), gym sessions, nights out and lots of stretching and healthy eating. My mind finely feels good again. I’ve had time to start reading again, in German of course 🙂 and even had time to slip in some bakes. Two of my closest friends are going through individual crises at the moment and I need to be there for them, especially as I experienced something similar in both of their situations.

In other, less morbid news….

– I could be crossing one of my Bucket List items off on the 8th June 😉 very exciting.

– I have entered the ballot for the New York Marathon – what I was thinking when I did this I don’t know, I wasn’t even pissed!

– I have signed up to the actual Will of Iron…which I did do whilst pissed and have just this second remembered – I think I need to quit wine.

– I think I have finally found my bridesmaid dresses!

– I may be booking another tattoo (my in-laws will love that – tehehe).

– I’ve got a skiing holiday on 7th Feb to get real excited about.

– I invested in some new running shoes……..2 pairs, oppsie. I will add photos of all of my new purchases in my next post as I want to do a haul/fitness update.

– I’m back to running 9-10 miles, adding on a mile each week.

– I’ve worked out that my new SITC box set I got for Christmas can be listened to in German! I have been glued to the telly today (I was off work due to some weird illness I have).

And finally, so this isn’t all just boring words, here are some of my photos of what I’ve been up to lately.

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Firstly, I have been loving the sunsets from our bedroom window recently, especially as they’re becoming later and later.

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Yeeees, we have dodgy windows!

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To help me relieve my stress, I’ve been having loads of long baths and getting stuck into this. It’s definitely a young adults book but that’s good for my German.

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Hahaha, had to add this, this is what I just realised I signed up to last night – why oh why do I drink!

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Loving this present I got for Christmas, it really motivates me to get out as you can see your splits, how you’re improving over time and of course, it’s green!

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I’ve been having trouble with my eating at the moment due to my stress, more so with just my body confidence so I found this picture of me when I was at my skinniest and using it as my ‘thinspiration’. I know how wrong this is but there is noway I would go back to my old ways, this is just to prove to myself that I can get to a size I’d like to be when I put my mind to it.

I’ve got a couple of post ideas lined up – now that I actually have time to myself my content will hopefully get a little more interesting. As I’ve said before, I don’t really have a direction with this blog but I lot of the time it will be my rants, thoughts, my fitness and my adventures 🙂 So I hope you keep enjoying a nose into my life and thoughts.

Hope you are all well and 2015 is being kind to you. Much love XX

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Our Wedding : The Reality of Planning [Part 2]

So following on from my wedding goals post, I’ve decided to talk to you about my wedding planning I’ve been doing. After going to a few weddings in the past few years, all I wanted to be was a wedding planner. I’m in love with the idea of love, I love to see people in love and I think weddings are a beautiful symbol, not to mention have me in tears without fail. So when Ben proposed, I was more than ecstatic. I am so excited to marry the one man (and I say man because most of my ex’s have been ‘boys’) I’ve ever felt crazily in love with, I feel like a smitten young girl in his arms.

The reality of planning the wedding I’d always dreamed of is, to be quite frank, a pain in the arse. I have enjoyed some bits which I’ll get into, but in other areas I’ve wanted to pull my hair out. Don’t get my wrong, I’m still excited as hell but some parts of this planning process I could’ve done without.

I won’t get into too much detail with this one as Part 3 is going to be details of my actual wedding, the more exciting bits, so you guys can have an insight to what sort of wedding we’re going for!

First things first, being the organising nob I am I made a wedding spreadsheet.

Screenshot 2014-12-07 16.04.45Colour coded and everything! So firstly I made the above tab with basically every aspect we need to think about so we don’t forget anything…I originally forgot to budget in favours – I mean I didn’t even know what these bloody things were! Luckily Ben’s cousin is also getting married to one of the most awesome girls I’ve ever met who I’ve mentioned before in posts about sticking together with his fam…so yeh she’s been helping me with ideas too!

Another important tab I definitely think is our budgets tab! For example I didn’t even realise how expensive flowers were for a wedding, I budgeted £500 for these….you think we can find any in that region? Nu uh. I mean not everything we’ve gone over budget on, infact we’ve saved a lot of money in some areas but budgeting is a MUST before organising a wedding.

I would show you that page but I think it’s a bit controversial as some people will be like ‘HOW MUCH’ or the opposite and think we’re scrimpy tight wads!

DSC01382 DSC01380 DSC01393So after much advice, browsing on the internet and gifts like the wedding planning and notes book that I was given, the rest of the planning could commence. I think having everything organised, printed, saved, whatever your preference is a must.

The order we planned in went something like this:
– The amount of guests
– The venue
– The registrar
– The date
– My dress
– My hair and makeup (priorities girls!)
– DJ
– Photographer
– Bits for favours
– First attempt at Bridesmaid dresses
– Save The Dates
– Cake
– Flowers
– Chair covers (another thing I didn’t even think about)

Currently…
– still looking for bridesmaid dresses
– having our invites designed

What’s left to do…
– Pick our rings
– Plan a honeymoon
– Choose our wedding food
– Send out invites
– Create our favours
– Find my wedding shoes
– Get the men’s suits
– Think about thank you gifts
– Buy the page boys and flower girls outfits
– Sort out the table plan and theme (already got an idea for this one 😉 )
– Buy a wedding book/something to write in

So we’ve still got lots to do but we’ve got the worst bits out of the way. My most favourite was obviously picking the venue and finding our cake supplier – who doesn’t love cake tasting.

My most stressful parts were definitely finding my dress and (still trying) to find bridesmaid dresses. A little piece of advice to anyone getting married; do not say to your bridesmaids they can pick what they want/ decide if they don’t like your choices. With the amount of bridesmaids I’ve got, it is just not happening! I’ve already bought 2 sets of dresses and had to send them all back, so yeh, pick the dresses and they’ll have to like it or lump it!

I’ve also had a problem with one of my bridesmaids but that’s for another time or maybe not even on here! But yes, be careful all your brides-to-be.

So my part 3 is basically going to be details of our actual wedding so you can have a little insight in, but to go in with my planning, here are some of my other photos. [WARNING: Spoiler alert]

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Organising – My Love/Hate Relationship

So as some of you may noticed, I missed my 3rd post of blogmas yesterday, what a poor show! It hasn’t annoyed me that I’m not fufilling a task because I’m one of those people (cough Gemini) who doesn’t see things through very often which is irritating for some around me but it honestly doesn’t bother often.

What does irritate me is my lack of organisational skills. I am the list writer. The thinker. The idea girl. The ‘I have 100 things on my mind’ girl and yet I still cannot make the time to get these thoughts into a blog! I know since moving I’ve added 3 hours to my day just commuting but what’s three hours when I probably used to waste those watching t.v?

I have this little notebook which I carry with me in my handbag for times when I think ‘ooh that’ll be a good post’ or when I need to write last minute shopping lists. In there I even wrote out a mini schedule to make sure I didn’t miss any blogs up until about the 20th. Even my work load at work has decreased ten fold, how have I managed to miss another day? I even bought myself TWO diaries to make sure I scheduled work, school work, blogging, fitness and socialising in, yet I still seem to have failed. That is what has annoyed me.

So I guess this post is more about what I do to organise myself – oh the irony!

Firstly, I have to have a yearly planner which runs through from school months – September – July (2014/2015).DSC01442

This one is what I write my main bits in, this is my core, if I lost this I would probably cry. It has my due dates for exams, dates with friends, deadlines for payments for the wedding, personal appointments…the lot!

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My second little book I have, this tiny little creature, he is what I use for various to-do lists, what to buy, my ‘I want’ lists (does anyone else ever write these?) and sometimes my goals.DSC01444

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This third and final planner which I got given at work is an hourly planner: I update this at the weekend for the week ahead to try and schedule what meals I’m having, where I’ll be each evening, plot in my runs etc etc. It’s a pretty dull planner, but I’ve found that having an hour by hour schedule is way easier on a shorter time scale.

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Why not use your phone I hear you say? Oh that’s because I have THIS as my phone. I can’t say I’ve attempted to use this for planning my life but the reputation Blackberries have for breaking down, I don’t think trusting this with all of my to-do’s, wax appointments and birthdays is a safe option – I’d rather stick to a good piece of paper.

So what do you guys use for your life planning/scheduling? Are you as anal as me and need 3 different books or do you actually have a life and do what you want when you want? F**k the planning!!!